


Two Conversations

by fraeuleinsahne



Category: The Dark Artifices Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2018-12-11
Packaged: 2019-09-16 11:44:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16953381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fraeuleinsahne/pseuds/fraeuleinsahne
Summary: Some time after the Events of QOAAD, Kit and Ty both have a conversation with a warlock, respectively.******If you put enough distance between the cause of your sadness and yourself, it slowly started to fade. Every mile a little more. But he knew, he couldn't just get rid of these feelings. They lay there, bottled up inside his unconsciousness, waiting to get opened every once in a while.





	1. Tessa and Kit

**Author's Note:**

> So, it's been ten years since I last published any fanfiction. But. I've finished QOAAD some days ago and I JUST. COULDN'T. COPE. I felt so sad I couldn't even sleep well.  
> I'm not a great fan of continuing a still-on-going story because I value the way the author intends the story to be. But I needed some closure for the events in QOAAD, so I can continue living my life till 2022 (how am I supposed to wait FOUR years?!). This doesn't really have much of a plot, it's just about how Kit and Ty are dealing with the words that were left unsaid between them. I also hope it fits into the storyline Cassie has in mind for them and will function as more of a deleted scene once TWP and the last GOTSM are out than an AU.  
> And lastly, I hope others can find a bit of closure in this as I'm sure (and seen on tumblr) that I'm not the only one unsatisfied with how things between Kit and Ty ended.

There was a knocking at Kit's door. It was soft, but determined.

  
He looked up from his book about runes and their meanings. It was part of the “basic Shadowhunter studies” he was doing with Jem at the moment and he actually found it quite interesting.

  
“Can I come in?” Tessa was standing at his doorframe.

  
“Of course.” He always liked the sight of Tessa, her belly becoming rounder by the hour. The baby was now expected to come sooner than later.

  
“I wanted to talk to you about something.”

She crossed his room to sit down next to him on his bed. It was strange that he had already become used to having someone so near to him all the time. But he liked the feeling nevertheless.

  
“Jem has talked to Emma today. She wanted you to know that Tiberius Blackthorn is going to go to the Scholomance. She thought you would like to know.”

  
Kit's heart sank. He had told himself everyday since his arrival in Devon that he wouldn't think of Ty today. That tomorrow he wouldn't care about him anymore.  
It had worked a little. If you put enough distance between the cause of your sadness and yourself, it slowly started to fade. Every mile a little more. But he knew, he couldn't just get rid of these feelings. They lay there, bottled up inside his unconsciousness, waiting to get opened every once in a while.

  
“I do, actually”, he admitted. “I'm glad that he does what he always wanted to do. I'm glad if he's happy.”

  
“That's what I wanted to talk to you, actually”, Tessa said. “Tiberius. You never said goodbye to him, though he clearly meant something to you. You can tell me, if you want to. I'm a good listener.”

  
Kit sighed. He had to talk about it eventually. It was eating him up from inside.

And he genuinely liked Tessa. He had known her for such a short time but he already had the feeling that someday she could really feel something like a mother to him.  
So why not take this chance?

  
“I told him I loved him. He didn't even react. Pretty simple.” The tears surprised him. He hadn't cried over Ty since... that day. But here he went again, unable to make them stop.

  
“Oh.” Tessa said. “Oh.” She softly took his hand in hers and squeezed it, reassuringly.  
He allowed his thoughts to trail back to that day.

  
When he had first heard the words, he had felt torn apart . _There's nothing if you aren't there._

  
He knew, deep down, that it wasn't that grave. He had never meant nothing to Ty. After all, he had cried when Kit had said those harsh things and he had tried to help him against the Riders with his slingshot.  
He had comforted him at the beach.  
He had tried to speak with him.  
He had opened up to him.  
But that wasn't the point.

  
“I didn't know... I mean, I hadn't really guessed there was something romantic involved...”, Tessa said shyly.

  
Kit just continued to cry silently over his still broken heart.

  
“I'm being pathetic”, he said after a while. “I shouldn't cry over someone I so barely knew...”

  
“No!” Tessa replied loudly. Kit almost jumped.

“You're not. You are fifteen years old and have never experienced real love or friendship from anyone before, aside from your father. No one your age should have endured what you had to endure. Many other people would have cracked much earlier. I can only imagine how sad you feel.”

  
He thought about it. Sure, his dad had loved him in his own way. But Tessa was right – there had never really been anyone else.  
And then, Ty had conquered his heart so easily, because his smile had let his dark world shine. He had given him his heart and he would have given him everything.  
But Ty hadn't been interested in that.

  
“It hurt so much. I realized he never thought of me the way I hoped he would. I don't know if he's even capable of this kind of love. Maybe he'll never be.  
So I couldn't stand saying goodbye to him. I wasn't strong enough. Does that make me a bad person?”

  
“Of course not! You are honest and kind and funny. You are a good person, Kit Herondale. Just because you made one choice you're not sure of, maybe even a bad choice, it doesn't make you a bad person. Good persons can make bad choices and still be good persons.”

  
“Do you think I should try talking to him?”

“You want me to be honest to you?”, Tessa asked reluctantly.

  
Kit nodded. At last, the tears had stopped streaming down his face.

  
“I think you both need time. It was good of you to finally talk about it. Sometimes, you have to speak things out loud to let them go.  
But there have been reasons that things turned out the way they are now.  
I don't think Tiberius ever intended to hurt your feelings nor that he didn't care about you. But it has become clear that at the moment there are more important things he has to focus on.  
It was good that you were there for him but..”

  
“... it wasn't necessarily what he needed at that moment.” _I should have stopped him._

  
Tessa smiled. “You sure are smart, Kit.”  
“Nah. I'm more of a Watson”, he replied, his eyes filling with tears again. After all, this had been Ty's nickname for him.

  
“You really had a bad timing for experiencing first love”, Tessa added thoughtfully and softly wiped away the tears that had reappeared on Kit's cheek. “But as I've said before, you are fifteen. You have plenty of time. Maybe now wasn't the right time. Maybe it'll come someday.  
But for now, focus on the things right ahead of you. It is much easier to fall in love knowing who you are than being all confused. You will see. You can't figure yourself out if you continue thinking only about the past.  
So, no, I don't think it would do you both any good to try and talk things out right now. Or do you really think, anything good, anything you don't already know would come of it?”

  
She was probably right. Ty might have cared about his departure, but not enough to try and contact Kit in the first place. He would be okay with it. And Kit wasn't ready to learn why.

He slowly shook his head.

  
“You have to learn who you are and what you want first. Both of you,” Tessa finished.

  
“Sounds reasonable to me.” Kit shrugged. There was still aching inside of him. His heart still felt broken. But there was also relief. Not everything had to be decided eventually. Tessa had finally encouraged him to take his time.

  
“You could write him a letter. You don't have to send it. You can write it and seal it to find closure. And maybe someday you'll reread it and decide what to do about it.”

  
“Yes. Maybe I'll do this. Have you ever been a teacher?”, Kit asked.  
“What?” Tessa blinked.  
“It just sounds like something a grade school teacher or so would suggest. You know, time capsules, writing to your future self, blah blah...”

  
Tessa laughed, loud and bright, and for the first time in what felt like forever, Kit laughed, too.  
In a rush of affection, he turned to hug Tessa, who seemed surprised but happy. He had never really hugged people aside Ty, but right now, he felt as if he could get used to it.

  
“Thank you, Tessa”, he said, still hugging her tight.  
“Thank you for trusting me, Kit.”

  
And just like that, Kit finally felt like he was home at last.


	2. Magnus and Ty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is from Magnus' POV because Cassie somewhere stated that she wouldn't give Ty's perspective away before TWP and I went with that.

Of all the people that had visited in the past weeks and months, Magnus hadn't expected his late visitor this night to be Tiberius Blackthorn.

  
He had suddenly been standing there in front of his apartment, looking small and insecure, as if he wasn't sure he really wanted to talk to the warlock.

But Magnus had invited him in, not pushing any farther about his reason to be there, because he knew about the difficulty of feeling different and needing to take time to express yourself.

  
He had made tea and here they were, sitting on his chaiselongue in silence.

  
Eventually, Ty broke the silence.

“I'm leaving for the Scholomance tomorrow. I wanted to thank you for encouraging me to go there. I don't know if I would have done it, if you hadn't. But I think it will be the right thing for me,” he said, still staring at the wall opposite them and not looking at Magnus.

  
“I'm glad for you”, Magnus replied. He really was. He genuinely liked Tiberius and knew he would lead no easy life.

But the Scholomance at least would be the right place for him to distract his thoughts and deal with his new life.

  
“But I actually wanted to talk to you about something. About Kit.”

  
_Ah_ , Magnus thought. That was what this was about.

  
“You told me, he left because of me”, Ty continued. “But it didn't sound as if you were talking about the necromancy thing. It sounded different. I've thought about it for a long time, but I couldn't find the solution.” He frowned, as if not finding the answer to a very difficult riddle.

  
“You are right, Tiberius”, Magnus replied slowly. “But I don't know much more than you do. I can't tell you about Kit Herondale's feelings.”

  
“Before he left, he told me he wished he'd never met me...” He sounded more confused than sad as saying that.

  
“You can't really believe that”, Magnus said. Or maybe, he could. He was different, after all.  
“Look, Tiberius. Sometimes, people have emotions so strong, they are overwhelmed by them. I'm sure you know such situations.”

  
Ty nodded.

  
“People say things they don't really mean in such situations. I'm sure that was the case for Kit.  
Or did he really act as if he didn't care for you?”

  
Ty remained silent for a long time.

Magnus could only imagine the things going on in his head.

After all, he still was fifteen years old and he had met enough fifteen-year-olds to know how difficult it was to deal with the strong emotions you had at that age.

  
“I'm sure you would have felt it if he had really meant the words he'd said.”

  
“He wouldn't have followed me to the battlefield”, Ty concluded.

  
“He wouldn't.” Magnus smiled.

  
“But still, he left without saying goodbye.” It was more of a flat statement than anything else, but Magnus knew enough to understand the meaning behind it.

  
He sighed. “You can't always understand every action of other people. They do things and you will never understand why they did them. You just have to accept them and move on. It takes patience and it takes time. But it's the only way to live around people. I must know – I've been around them for quite a while.”

He was well aware that this answer wouldn't be enough for just anyone. But it seemed to satisfy Ty.

  
“There's something else...” Now Ty really looked insecure. His fingers started moving slightly. “He told me he loved me.”

  
Magnus raised an eyebrow. He couldn't say he was exactly surprised.

  
“He told me he loved me and I said nothing. I told Livvy that without her, there was nothing and he must have thought...” His fingers started to move faster, more uncontrolled. “But he must know that he doesn't mean nothing to me.”

  
“Hearts are strange and fragile. He needed something you couldn't give him.”

  
“But what if I do love him? How do I know?” It didn't sound desperate, just curious.

  
“You would know if you did.”

  
Ty seemed to think about it. “I don't know. I miss him. But I'm looking forward to the Scholomance. I still think about Livvy a lot. And I think about all those changes that are going to happen. It's just... not so important right now?”

  
“You will find out eventually. There's much time left for you to figure out yourself and what you expect from life, now that everything has changed. And when you finally do find out you love him, don't be afraid. Because love always finds its way.”

  
Finally, Ty smiled. His smile was extraordinary.

Magnus could get a glimpse of what Kit must have felt looking at him.

  
“I have one last thing”, Ty added. “You told me that change is all that helps. I don't like change really much, but I hope you're right. Do you think, Kit is happy with his new life?”

  
“I can't answer that for him. But Jem and Tessa are good people and Kit is lucky to become part of their family. I think it will do him good.”

  
“Good.” Ty nodded and stood up. “I would want him to be happy.”

  
Magnus walked him to the door in silence. He half expected him to go without saying any more words. But he turned around just as he had left the doorframe.

  
“Thank you, Magnus. I don't know where I would be now without your advice.”

  
“Oh, I've heard that quite often”, Magnus joked, but smiled fondly.

He only shut the door after Ty was out of side.

  
Tiberius Blackthorn would lead no easy life. But he wasn't just different, he was extraordinary. Magnus was sure that – against all odds – he would find his way.

  
And then, maybe, love would find him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted both chapters at once to get them out of my system :D  
> Now I'm probably going to read all reunion-fics that are being published until TWP, because I can't live without KitTy for so long.
> 
> Also, is there anybody else scared of not being interested in these characters anymore once TWP finally comes out?

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it!
> 
> And if anyone wants/needs to talk about QOAAD, feel free to message me!


End file.
